My neighbour Mohammed told me he was going away for two weeks, and he asked me if I'd pop over and feed his cats.
"I'll do my best," I replied, " ...
I just read that Camels and Llamas were notorious for spitting...And all this time I thought it was because my Jizz tasted bad!
I was talking to my Welsh mate Dai, and he said to me, "You know, my biggest fantasy ever would be to be one of those two Cowboys on Brokeback Mount ...
Why did the American cross the road?
He didn't, he was too fat.
Me and the mrs practice S&M every night......she sleeps in masturbate
All the big teams aren't doing too well....
The only country doing well is Cristiano Ronaldo!
- Why did you stay home from school today?! You don't seem sick
- I fucked my sister, how sick is that?
Behind every great man
A woman will appear
Enjoyed a lovely Father's Day meal today, washed down with a nice couple of pints, but all my wife and kids have done is moan about it.
And then t ...
I may come across as a boring geek but I'll have you know I've grafted most of the girls at my college.
And my charts tell me that girls betwee ...
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